Strategies For Convincing A Spouse To Save A Marriage
you’re partner seems minutes away from packing their bags or you’re
living separately already convincing a spouse to save a marriage can
seem next to impossible. If you take a step back from the situation,
though, you can see that there are realistic options for changing the
mind of a spouse who’s about to walk out. Here are some strategies that
may just get your partner to come around.
Fake it ’til you make it’
It’s a common strategy for business and other areas of social like, but
acting ‘as if’ can work for marriages, too. It works so well because how
we act has a major influence both on how we feel and on how others see
For a while, try forgetting that you have anything but a perfectly
blissful marriage and treat your spouse accordingly. Now, that’s not
going to be so easy if your partner’s still bitter and liable to pick a
fight. Still, you can take advantage of those times when things are
going well to try to see your spouse as the person you were deeply in
love with when you decided to get married.
Whether you want your spouse to join you in marriage counseling or just
try out a few tips you picked up from a book, you’ll have more success
in winning them over if you don’t push. Threats, guilt trips, and
begging are more likely to push your partner away than give you any
success convincing him to save a marriage. Instead, use a calm logical
approach that taps into the underlying regard you spouse most likely
still has for you or at least for the children.
Statements like ‘With everything we’ve invested in each other, don’t you
think it’s worth a try to save it?’ or ‘Wouldn’t you rather be able to
tell the kids we tried everything?’ can help.
Address the problems
When convincing a spouse to save a marriage, promises to change ring
pretty hollow unless you can back them up. If you expect your husband to
believe you’re not going to repeat certain mistakes in the future, give
them a real reason. This is especially important if you’ve had an
affair or you’re struggling with an addiction.
For instance, if you’ve started counseling to resolve an addiction that
you’ve never dealt with before, your partner has a reason to believe
things will get better.
Take care of yourself
The stress and low mood, marital problems naturally bring about, can
leave you feeling like you just don’t want to do anything. For your own
sake, though, don’t give in to that feeling or you’ll only make yourself
feel worse and drive your spouse farther away.
Make sure you’re eating right, getting enough sleep, and not cutting
corners on personal grooming. Stay on top of your responsibilities like
finances and home maintenance.
Convincing a spouse to save a marriage isn’t always easy, but it can be
done. The most important thing you need to do is stay calm, stay upbeat,
and actively look for solutions to the problems between you.
If you need more advice on convincing your spouse to save a marriage,
most marriage counselors and professionally written self-help ebooks
online can give you some